Last night, I went to a jewelry party at a friends's house. I knew that they had built a new house a couple of years ago but, due to our crazy schedules, I never seemed to be able to make it to any of her events at home to check out the new place. So last night was my chance. There are few words I know that can accurately describe this house. Stunning, excrutiatingly beautiful....you get the idea. Every thing was in its place, the decor was something out of Better Homes and Gardens. Everything was just...perfect. Now, I do NOT begrudge her this house. Her and her husband work hard and they are wonderful people. That isn't the problem. The problem was being there made me feel so inadequate. Inadequate about my unfinished house (and the dozen or so unfinished projects in that unfinished house), my decorating choices (I really have no style to speak of), my lack of real organization where it counts. I am not sure that this would be classified as jealousy. I do not want what they have for myself. I do not think that they don't deserve it so I am not sure that this is jealousy. But it is something. I have been praying about it, trying to figure out what exactly is bugging me but, as usual, my conversations with Him are very one sided.

I know jealousy is a sin but what is this? Am I sinning by wishing I was better at the whole-house-put-together thing? By wanting to have everything "done" and pretty? I worry that my wanting this isn't so much for myself or family but for those who may come to my house. I worry about what people will think of my home so I frantically try to clean up when someone is dropping by at the last minute. I cannot stand for someone to see my house messy. Yet, somehow, it doesn't really bother me that my family lives in the messy house. Why, on earth, should it matter to me what others think if my kitchen counters are covered in mail, magazines, recipes and jars? Or that there is more dog hair on my floor than is on the dog? Do visitors even notice these "horrendous" errors in my housekeeping? Last week, we had a contractor out here to give us an estimate on doing some remodeling and all I could focus on was the cobwebs on the wall (it's an outside wall for pete's sake!) and the freshly fallen leaves covering the pool deck. I worried that he might think we are just sloppy people or something. Why does this bother me?????

I have a feeling that this is not going to be a question that gets answered any time soon. Is there anyone else out there that feels like this? Anyone who feels they are being judged all the time? Would love to hear your thoughts and suggestions....

This Morning...

I was coming off the high of yesterday's first day back at homeschooling going off without a hitch when the universe decided to conspire against my family. It all started about 4:30 this morning. I got up to...ya know...relieve myself and when I got back into bed, I thought I heard a car horn. So I drug my half asleep self to the door to see if anything was going on outside. Nothing, but something felt a little off. Couldn't put my finger on what so I went back to bed but didn't fall back asleep until after 5:30. When the alarm went off at 6, I was not a happy person so I stayed in bed until hubby got showered and dressed. In one of those moods, I went about getting myself ready. Hubby's office is on the property so he doesn't have a very long commute to work so I was wondering why he was already calling me from the office. Our conversation went something like this: Me: Hello? Him: Flood, bring towels and anything to soak up water! Me: crap! I am not in a talkative mood when I'm sleepy.
So I get the kids and all the towels I can find and head next door to the office which is also my laundry room. The significance of that little fact will be revealed now. Remember when I said that something didn't feel right when I got up to check on that horn? Well, last night I set the washer on delay so that it would have the towels washed before I got up so I could start them drying first thing this morning. It would have been washing about 4:30 this morning. Apparently, the valve that connects the hoses to the water line got a pinhole in it and was spraying water all.over.the.office! Well, not all over the whole office. Just all over my dad's desk, phone books, maps, computer, phone, notes, paper. I might add that his desk is made of plywood that hubby built and backs up to my washer. The walls are covered in pine boards that we got locally and the floor has laminate wood flooring where the desks are and carpet where the washer and dryer are. This was NOT what I wanted to wake up to. I didn't even get a cup of coffee until after the bulk of the clean up was done. We moved everything out that could be moved and cut out the carpet that was ruined. Fortunately, dad's desk was ok because hubby sealed it when he built it and I hung up his books and papers in front of a fan to help dry them. The wood floor will have to be pulled up. It was already buckling when hubby walked in. He was so cute (pathetic) when he told me that he was walking up to the door when he saw all this water in front of the door. He thought we got some rain last night until he realized that the water was coming from under the door ON THE INSIDE! So, we got all of that cleaned up so they could work and about an hour later, hubby comes to the kitchen and gets a bottle of whiskey out of the pantry. That can only mean one thing. What ELSE happened??? He was sitting in his office chair and heard a pop. The thing always makes weird noises so he didn't think too much of it until the chair threw him out onto the floor. He had just finished telling the boys "I don't know how else today could get much worse". You know God was sitting there giggling as He showed him how it could get worse! Needless to say, today did not get off to a great start. But you know what? I finally did get that coffee. That ugly carpet in the office will finally get replaced and now we have some motivation to move stuff around in there so we can fit the new guy hubby is hiring. So, I guess things aren't quite as bad as they seem before coffee. I am certainly NOT going to ask how they could get worse! Thank you Lord for helping me see the positive instead of focusing so much on the negative.

Join us for Gratituesday at Heavenly Homemakers!

To Have a Dishwasher Or Not To....

Not quite 2 weeks ago, my dishwasher went kaput. Then a very strange thing happened. I realized that I really didn't miss it. Yes, I now wash dishes several times a day but it doesn't really bother me. Each morning while I make breakfast, I fill the sink with hot soapy water. As I cook, dirty stuff goes into the sink. When we finish eating, I wash everything and leave it in the strainer to dry. I HATE drying dishes! At lunch and dinner, I do the same thing. If it happens to be a major cooking day, I will do an extra sinkful of dishes between lunch and dinner. Since the twins are responsible for nightly dish duty, this hasn't really bothered them. They always had to wash the pots and pans before so now there are just some plates, cups and forks added to it. They haven't complained a bit. Want to know who is in a real hurry to get a new one? Hubby! And he doesn't even do dishes! He says that we need one because we may have to run a sanitized load if someone gets sick. Hmmmm. Whatever did people do before there were dishwashers to sanitize their dishes?????

Anyway, just to humor him, I went to Home Depot and looked at the dishwashers. Who is it that decided that a kitchen machine that has just ONE function should cost approximately both arms and a leg??? No kidding, $600 for the cheaper ones and $800 and up for the better ones! WHY?? It is not like manufacturers are building them to last because a new one will konk out after 4-6 years. You know, that kind of money will keep me in sponges and dish detergent (the organic ones at that!) FOREVER!!!

Now, if I can just get hubby to agree....

So, what do you prefer. Good ole hand washing or the easy no mess dishwasher?

Hand Soap Failure

I love a good experiment. Going from being a city girl to a farm girl has been one BIG experiment! When I find a "recipe" for a homemade version of something I normally have to buy, I get all kinds of excited. Thankfully, for the most part, I have been very successful at those "recipes". I haven't had too many flops that couldn't be fixed. Unfortunately, this was one of those flops. I have made liquid handsoap a couple of times. The recipe is easy but the finished product left a little to be desired. To be completely honest, the finished product had the consistency of snot. Then, when you used it from the pump dispenser, a little would leak from the opening and puddle on the counter. Not attractive! So I came upon this little recipe that sounded like it might work a little better. I truly don't remember where I saw this but it was simply 3 bars of soap grated and 6 cups of hot water. Stir until soap is melted and pour into jars to sit for 24 hours when the soap would be at the "perfect" consistency. Sounds easy enough. I grated 3 bars of soap and melted them in the water. I poured the liquid into 2 jars and waited. The next day I checked the jars and was surprised to see that it had formed a gushy solid! How in the heck was that supposed to work in a pump dispenser? I stuck a knife in it and pried it out of the jar into a big bowl. I added some liquid castile soap to see if it would "loosen" up a bit. It did a little so I was hopeful that adding some water would help more. I added some water and whisked and whisked and whisked. The consistency was getting better. The really hard part came when I tried to pour it into the container that I store it in (old refill container for handsoap, makes filling the dispensers a breeze!). I don't have a funnel that is small enough for the opening so I was trying to use a large measuring cup with a pour spout. It ended up all over the container, the counter, ME! It was a huge hassle but I finally got most of it in the container. I haven't filled the dispensers yet so I don't know how it will work but I am completely unsatisfied with the results! I only "rehydrated" one of the jars I made so I will be going thru this one more time but, after that, I am going back to my old "recipe"....until I find a better one ;-)

Project #1 Complete...Almost!

We have been SUPER busy around here lately. It seems that as soon as we get one thing done, 10 more things need to be done. It doesn't help that hubby has entered his busy season at work so he can't always help me with projects. He did help me with a few Saturday, though. This particular project has been on my mind for quite a few months and now it is done enough to use.

TADA!!!!!

I now have a clothesline to hang my wash on!!!! Hubby still needs to take off the stabilizing boards but I can now use it! I am more excited about that than just about anything else we have going on around here. I know, I'm weird.

I never knew how aggravating it could be to put up a clothesline, though. First of all, the ground was so hard that even using the auger on my BIG tractor couldn't penetrate through. So we started soaking the ground with a hose and wouldn't you know, the next day it rained. That helped tremendously. Then hubby wasn't happy that the poles weren't in EXACT alignment so we had to redo the middle hole a couple of times. I kept telling him that this line would only be here for a year or two, until we built our new house and then it would be moved. I wasn't looking for perfection but I guess he was! Anyway, we got it as close to perfect as it is going to get. I was so happy to get to use it finally. The only bad thing is that by the time I got to do a load and hang it, it was too late to do anymore! Imagine that, looking forward to laundry :)

Coming soon-project # 2....

Homemade Fabric Softener

Sadly, I am one of those people who love liquid fabric softener. Downy and Snuggle are my favorites. Why do I love them? The scent. They have some of the nicest scents and my clothes smell so wonderful after I use them. BUT they are ex.pen.sive! I came across many fabric softener recipes on the internet and I settled on this one from Becky at Petticoat Junction. It uses stuff I have here without having to make a trip to the store.

INGREDIENTS

1 C. Hair Conditioner (Cheap stuff is perfect for this!)
2 C. Vinegar
6 C. Hot Water

Whisk all the ingredients together until it is completely combined. Use as you would store bought fabric softener. This is soooooo much cheaper than store bought and, so far, my clothes smell and feel great. I used up some old conditioner that I wasn't crazy about for my hair, but smelled great, the first time I made it and I bought the cheapest (nicest smelling) conditioner at the store for this batch.

A Couple of Updates

Back in December, we decided that we would not be eating out the entire month of January. We almost made it. Twice, I took the kids to lunch when we were out grocery shopping, once my husband took our son to lunch because they had errands to run in town and once I picked up KFC just because I couldn't think of one thing I wanted to cook! Not perfect but we saw progress. I cook 3 meals a day, EVERY DAY so sometimes I just needed a break. The main thing I learned was that A) It isn't that hard to cook from scratch once you know what you are making and B) I kinda like my cooking better than any restaurant. I think we will be continuing this through February.

In January, I tried the no-poo method of washing my hair. After 3 1/2 weeks I am dropping this for a couple of reasons. First, I really don't like the smell of apple cider vinegar. Even though you cannot smell it in your hair once it is dry, it really stinks up the shower while you are in there! Second, part of the idea was that I would be able to only "wash" my hair a few times a week. Nope. I had to do it every single day or the greasies took over. Third, I am not quite happy with some of the results. I do love that my hair is much fuller at the crown (usually that only happened when I colored my hair) and that I wasn't using anything toxic on my head. However, my hair never really felt clean. There were a couple of times when I had to put my hair up because it just looked a bit greasy even after I showered. My ends are also in serious bad shape. Not because of the no-poo, though. They were rough when I started so I will be going and getting a bunch of it cut off :-( I think I will look for a shampoo/conditioner that doesn't contain harmful chemicals and that doesn't stink like ACV!!!!

Our goal for February is to continue eating most meals at home as I really love saving the money! I will get hubby out for a date night once in awhile, though! This is also the time to begin starting my seeds and prepping the garden. I want to grow 75% of our fruits and veggies this year. I will be doing MUCH canning and preserving over the next several months. I CAN'T WAIT!!!! Funny how, at the end of the growing season last year, I was so happy for it to be over and now I can't wait to get my hands dirty again. Go figure.
This month I will also being trying a new recipe using a familiar meat in a new way. Nothing ground breaking for those of you that are used to eating wild game but quite a first for me. I have used venison ground, cubed and stewed but never have I used the tenderloin. I tasted it once, years ago, and hated it. But then again, I hated venison period at that time. Since hubby hunts a lot, deer is our main meat source so I am giving it another shot. Plus the tenderloin steaks will be wrapped in bacon so how bad could it be??? I am thinking of making them for Valentine's Day so I will post about it then.

On the cleaning front, I have journeyed into making my own laundry detergent. Just started using it this week and, so far so good. I'll post the recipe I am using for that later once I use it a bit more. The real test will be when we start working outside again and get all dirty, smelly and grimy. As far as household cleaners, this is what I use:
Granite counters- combo of castille soap, hot water and tea tree oil all mixed together and kept in a squirt bottle. I have read some blogs that use vinegar on their granite but I have been told that, over time, vinegar will pit granite and I am NOT taking any chances!

Sinks, showers, tubs, toilets- Good ol' vinegar and baking soda. Honestly, there isn't anything better! Plus, no bad chemicals to mess with the delicate balance of organisms in our septic tank! If you have ever had septic tank trouble you can appreciate that!

Carpets- To freshen, baking soda mixed with some essential oil, sprinkled all over and later vacuumed up.
To clean- Baking soda and tea tree oil mixed with hot water and poured into the cleanser dispenser on my carpet cleaner. Makes the whole house smell fresh and my carpets are clean and oh so soft!

Mirrors/windows-I just use vinegar in a spray bottle but some people say to mix either water or alcohol with it to keep it from streaking. I haven't had a streaking problem so I am sticking with it.

Hand Soap- I ran out of my chemical filled hand soap refill so I made my own using a grated bar of Ivory, glycerin and water. It is a bit runnier but works just fine. I'll post that recipe soon.

Facial Cleanser-I still have some of my oil of olay left so I will use that until it is done then I will use what my kids use which is the cleaner I use on my counters. I LOVE things with multiple uses!!!

As soon as I use up my chapstick (I am an addict to them!), lotion, moisturizer and deodorant, I will be making those myself too. I will post those recipes as I make and use them.

Well, that is about it my friends. Things are getting pretty busy around here. Just the way I like it!

No-poo...Really????

No-poo...Trust me, this has NOTHING to do with a toilet! This is all about going shampoo (and conditioner) free. I have seen quite a few people on some of the blogs I read doing this and, since I am all about the getting rid of grocery store stuff, I thought this might be interesting. I have shoulder length, very fine hair that is 'almost' uncolored. My hair tends to be very oily and I have to wash it every day. If our skin is our largest organ, why in the world do we insist on pouring, scrubbing and slathering on the toxins??? So, for the next 2 weeks I am going to try the no-poo method.  Here is a site that will give you all the details on why and how. Very interesting reading if I do say so myself. I have spent much time in the shower reading the ingredients on the back of shampoo and, after I get past 'water', things start to get a little dicey. I'll keep you posted as to how this is going.

Alternative To Chemical Carpet Cleaners

We were having some friends over the other night and my carpets were in some serious need of cleaning. With 2 dogs, 2 kids and one husband who wears his filthy work boots all throughout the house, the carpets needed a good cleaning. I got out my trusty Hoover carpet cleaner and went to the pantry to get the carpet cleaning solution. I looked high and low but there was none to be found. Oh No!!! I just knew my friends would walk in my house and immediately smell...dog...stinky feet...or worse! Never fear, I had baking soda...and tea tree oil! I got a little experimenty because I just couldn't bear my carpets any longer. I dissolved a heaping tablespoon of baking soda in some hot water and added about 1/8 teaspoon of tea tree oil. I figured that baking soda is a natural deodorizer and tea tree oil has wonderful antibacterial properties so this could actually work. I wasn't too worried about hurting my carpets because I wasn't using any chemicals so I poured my concoction into the cleaner holder and went to cleaning. Dirty, disgusting water being sucked up into the machine was a good sign. The tea tree oil scent was rather refreshing. I finished cleaning those disgusting carpets and noticed that the house smelled clean and fresh. Once the carpets were dry, I noticed that they were VERY soft! Of course, I had to get down there and sniff them. No stinkies!!!! SUCCESS!!!! This is just one more product I can cross off my list of buying at the store.